Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Bleeding heart...
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
The Rat and the Raj
There are a few characters and mannerisms that I would like to explain first before beginning the actual thing. This story involves 4 living things, 3 humans and one animal to be precise. Since the mode is narration, it would be a natural conclusion to all the serious readers that I am one of humans in consideration. The next one is my shadow at home, the person who relentlessly chases me around in the very little time when I am home and not chasing my incessant dreams, my daughter Siddhi. The next one, the protagonist of the story, would be my husband and Siddhi's father, Rajeev, hereafter addressed as the Raj. Leaving very little to your imagination, the animal in the story is a Rat, as the title signifies. Apparently, Raj and Rat rhyme, which is perfect! For any other animal I would have demanded a new husband, like a Drake for a Snake or a Calvin for a Cat
Another major observation that invites a mention here is the attire of the protagonist, the Raj. Its called 'Mundu' in Malayalam, which is nothing but a longer loin cloth, much longer infact. It makes the already attractive men of Kerala even more hot(What was I thinking I wrote this? or was I thinking at all!!!). Anyways, our men are extremely proficient in precariously managing this piece of clothing which more often than not is the only piece of cloth they have on their body, when at home.
So on this pleasant Good Friday morning, I was inevitably given the responsibility of feeding Siddhi, by my sadistic mom, who had a crooked smile on her face which could have meant only one thing, 'let me see how you do it'. For details on 'How to feed Siddhi and kill yourself', please visit my previous blog, 'Our world, being turned around'. To update you, Siddhi had acquired a new-found interest towards her father's car, which is again a very pleasing development, so all that I have to do now is to lock the two of us inside the Punto Emotion, turn on the AC, play the radio and wait for those invaluable moments when she opens her mouth. One of these days, I know that the battery would die and that would be a day when Raj might annihilate his family out of anger. As we stepped down to the courtyard, I saw him for the first time. Oh, not Raj, I see him all the time, I mean the other one, charming, attractive, naughty and nude, the Rat. I usually don't give out that typical girlish shriek when I see a mosquito, cockroach, lizard, house fly, honey bee or an ant. But rats and snakes and the ones in the higher echelons of the food chain do scare me. However, this particular specimen elicited no fear out of me, partially due to the fact that I had a the choice to running back into the house or forward into the car without the rat observing me and partially because the rat had excited Siddhi whose mouth was now open for a blob of Puttu and Pazham to go in. I quietly moved into the car with my girl, closed the door and soon forgot the rat and its nudity.
It was then that Raj materialized from nowhere, well not nowhere exactly, but it was unusual for him to be awake at 8:30AM on a holiday. Raj, as I mentioned earlier, was clad in his mundu and was walking around without a care in the world. It was precisely at this moment that he set his eyes on Rat. The events hereafter can be flavored with some deadly, threatening music. Try something on if you are game!
With or without the music, this is how the events progressed. Raj was doing all sort of funny and fierce acts as I looked at him. He was looking at me too, but I could make no sense of what was happening. It was then that I realized that he was trying to talk to me and the car windows were rolled up. I lowered them. Raj was calling out to me and was asking if Siddhi and I were safe. I passed a cursory glance at the world around me for any imminent threat to our lives, and finding nothing significant, replied that we were indeed safe. Raj slowly moved on, put on his shoes, which clearly was the only footwear he could find. I leave it to the imagination of the readers to visualize how a sleepy, hairy man, wearing just a mundu, adorns himself in a pair woodland shoes, all looking ready to go for a war. The rat was now alert and had realized that the husband of the sweet woman who had looked at it with adoring eyes, was onto him, perhaps for eyeing his pretty wife. It was then that Raj started a series of tap dance steps that made me and Siddhi gape at him for a few seconds before we started laughing out. Raj would tap his feet a few times, look at the rat, challenge it, and the rat, sensing danger would run a few steps before stopping to enjoy the rest of the tap dance. This went on until the rat reached the gate. But he was not one to give up so quickly. The rat turned around, footed himself and stared at Raj. The world stood still at this moment. Raj looked around, made sure no one is watching him(except his wife ofcourse) and stared back at the rat. Two strong living things, in a point of indecision! Raj concentrated, rat concentrated harder, I concentrated the most and Siddhi concentrated on the steering wheel of the car. After those precious moments of concentration, when the man and the animal looked exactly the same with Raj progressing to look just as cute as the rat, when I did not know which side the cheer for and when Siddhi did not know which button would turn off the indicator that she had just managed to turn on, the world lost interest in everything mentioned above. The rat quit and moved out, Raj looked around once again to make sure that he did not leave any witness of his valor behind and Siddhi turned on the wiper of the car. For those who have the music on, you may turn it off now, the story is over.
As I said in the beginning, this is pretty much it, no morals, no lessons to be learned, except that life at times leave events which may not last for more than a few minutes, but which can be recalled in the rest of our lives just to smile :).
Monday, April 2, 2012
I know where I am, but this is not how it should be!
Déjà-vu is among the most popular French words imported to English and means ‘already seen or experienced’. It is a kind of feeling experienced, when you are in a place or situation where you haven’t consciously been before, but you have a strong feel that you have been. Déjà-vu is more a phenomenon of the subconscious mind, usually attributed to dreams and the picture that they leave behind. As opposed to the popularity of Déjà-vu, more so after the Hollywood movie released in 2006, starring Denzel Washington, its literary mirror-image, Vu- jade is much less known, though technically speaking, is a far more common, probable and detrimental phenomenon.
Consider for a moment than you are attending an interview for a marketing job, with a panel well known for its core marketing questions and all of a sudden, the interviewers start throwing questions at you on cosmology or oceanography or some obscure and totally unrelated field, the feeling that you have that point can be described as a mild version of Vu-jade. In layman’s language, one may end up asking himself, ‘What the hell is going on and what do I do now?’ The very fact that you are thrown off the feet would seriously impair your chances of answering those questions, even if you have sufficient knowledge about the topics.
Vu-jade is a feeling of ‘I have never been here before or I know where I am, but this is not how it should be’. This is a trait inherent to the human mind. Humans are more or less seasoned to adapt to various circumstances, any unexpected or unreasonable deviation from this seasoning cannot be easily surmounted by the human mind. When a person is informed about a particular incident, and is given a clear picture of how things should and should not work, it is natural for her to adapt herself to the image she already has in mind. The moment things start working against this presumed interpretation, all senses fall apart. You have no one to turn to, no idea what to do and is in a disastrous state of emotional chaos and self destruction. Celebrated organizational theorist, Karl. E. Weick explains this phenomenon and how detrimental it could be for an organization or an individual, with the example of the Mann Gulch fire disaster. This was published in the Administrative Science Quarterly in 1993 and was widely read and acclaimed. The Mann Gulch fire disaster occurred in the year 1949, when a group of fire fighters were dislodged over the Mann Gulch area, where a lightening had sparked off a forest fire. Things started going wrong from the beginning itself, as the single radio that the team had was pulverized before the operation even started. The fire, which was initially considered to be a 10:00 fire, meaning it could be fixed before 10:00 AM the next morning, was much more aggressive and severe than was estimated. This ultimately turned to a death trap, killing 13 men, who surprisingly had means at hand to save themselves. Weick attributes the failure and the apparent death of the men to collapse of sense making, and the feeling was Vu-Jade was among the major contributors to this. Then men were dysfunctional as firefighters once all their perceptions about the fire ended up being wrong, they could not negotiate with their comprehensions and what they were seeing around and were blind and oblivious to the feasible solutions that could have saved their lives.
The human mind takes more than what we can possibly imagine in adapting to a situation it is not familiar with, particularly when another deeper picture is already embedded in it. Organization breaks, its members no longer trust each other and end up being irrational in their thoughts and actions and all hell breaks loose, thanks to Vu-jade.
In the management field, there is a huge and unlimited scope for Vu-jade. The more the uncertain and complex the environment becomes, the more are the avenues for the ‘Where am I?’ feeling. Resisting this becomes a necessary and sufficient condition for organizational stability and flexibility, both. The knowledge of the possibility of this uncertainty is the first step towards combating this omnipresent abnormality. When one is in a frame of mind to expect and accept beyond what is known, seen or experienced, very few things can surprise him. Wide experience, wisdom and a strong leadership always help. Respect for each other, the willingness to work together and the ability to think out of the box are among the other major contributors to get over or get used to the sense of Vu-jade.
So the next time you find the string of your expectations and assumptions broken, you can safely conclude that you are stepping into the quagmire of Vu-jade, and unlike his distanced brother Déjà-vu, this one is not really friendly or exciting, and if not looked out for, can beat the senses and the sense-making process in you!
Consider for a moment than you are attending an interview for a marketing job, with a panel well known for its core marketing questions and all of a sudden, the interviewers start throwing questions at you on cosmology or oceanography or some obscure and totally unrelated field, the feeling that you have that point can be described as a mild version of Vu-jade. In layman’s language, one may end up asking himself, ‘What the hell is going on and what do I do now?’ The very fact that you are thrown off the feet would seriously impair your chances of answering those questions, even if you have sufficient knowledge about the topics.
Vu-jade is a feeling of ‘I have never been here before or I know where I am, but this is not how it should be’. This is a trait inherent to the human mind. Humans are more or less seasoned to adapt to various circumstances, any unexpected or unreasonable deviation from this seasoning cannot be easily surmounted by the human mind. When a person is informed about a particular incident, and is given a clear picture of how things should and should not work, it is natural for her to adapt herself to the image she already has in mind. The moment things start working against this presumed interpretation, all senses fall apart. You have no one to turn to, no idea what to do and is in a disastrous state of emotional chaos and self destruction. Celebrated organizational theorist, Karl. E. Weick explains this phenomenon and how detrimental it could be for an organization or an individual, with the example of the Mann Gulch fire disaster. This was published in the Administrative Science Quarterly in 1993 and was widely read and acclaimed. The Mann Gulch fire disaster occurred in the year 1949, when a group of fire fighters were dislodged over the Mann Gulch area, where a lightening had sparked off a forest fire. Things started going wrong from the beginning itself, as the single radio that the team had was pulverized before the operation even started. The fire, which was initially considered to be a 10:00 fire, meaning it could be fixed before 10:00 AM the next morning, was much more aggressive and severe than was estimated. This ultimately turned to a death trap, killing 13 men, who surprisingly had means at hand to save themselves. Weick attributes the failure and the apparent death of the men to collapse of sense making, and the feeling was Vu-Jade was among the major contributors to this. Then men were dysfunctional as firefighters once all their perceptions about the fire ended up being wrong, they could not negotiate with their comprehensions and what they were seeing around and were blind and oblivious to the feasible solutions that could have saved their lives.
The human mind takes more than what we can possibly imagine in adapting to a situation it is not familiar with, particularly when another deeper picture is already embedded in it. Organization breaks, its members no longer trust each other and end up being irrational in their thoughts and actions and all hell breaks loose, thanks to Vu-jade.
In the management field, there is a huge and unlimited scope for Vu-jade. The more the uncertain and complex the environment becomes, the more are the avenues for the ‘Where am I?’ feeling. Resisting this becomes a necessary and sufficient condition for organizational stability and flexibility, both. The knowledge of the possibility of this uncertainty is the first step towards combating this omnipresent abnormality. When one is in a frame of mind to expect and accept beyond what is known, seen or experienced, very few things can surprise him. Wide experience, wisdom and a strong leadership always help. Respect for each other, the willingness to work together and the ability to think out of the box are among the other major contributors to get over or get used to the sense of Vu-jade.
So the next time you find the string of your expectations and assumptions broken, you can safely conclude that you are stepping into the quagmire of Vu-jade, and unlike his distanced brother Déjà-vu, this one is not really friendly or exciting, and if not looked out for, can beat the senses and the sense-making process in you!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
The moment
Disclaimer: This is a blog related to motherhood.
**************************************************
There are some moments in life that one would never forget. Memories of those moments, that grow stronger over time. The ones you cherish, treasure and replay time and again in your conscience, when happy or when sad, alike. Counting such moments in life would tell you how many times your life was near-perfect.
My magic moment was when I saw her for the first time ever. She came to our lives 3 weeks before the expected date. Over the 9 months we spent, counting the day of her arrival, I had imagined her with many faces. But nothing had prepared me to the beauty of the perfect little person who was handed over to me by the nurse. Maybe, all mothers feel the same way. Technically, it was the second time I saw her, when I actually saw her. I have a very poor eyesight and my doctor decided to let me go blind before the surgery. So my precious spectacles were handed over to the shivering hands of my mom, along with my other belongings.
Apparently, when after 10 minutes of the surgery, the doctor lifted up a tiny, screaming infant and showed me, I could see nothing, it was infact precisely a bee view, which consists of numerous blurred dots and nothing else. God! I could not even get a chance to count her fingers!
So, as I lay on the ICU bed a few hours after the C-section, with one bottle each hanging on either side of me, one pumping the IV fluid and the other pumping my husband Rajeev's blood into me (he still claims that I turned royal the day he donated his blood for me ;)), all that I could think of was meeting my daughter. I could hear her crying intermittently in the NICU which was side by the ICU. I waited and waited.
It might be a mother's instinct or anything you might call it, but the moment the nurse walked in with a baby, I knew she was mine. She was wrapped in a peach colored cloth and had a pink band around her wrist, with the name 'Baby of Vidya'. A few hours into the world, the link of the umbilical cord lost after 9 months, she was still connected to me through my name, and she would be, I was sure, for the rest of our lives together, one way or the other.
She was hungry and she needed her mother. The nurse helped me hold her. The first thing I noticed about her was her chin. She had a long chin, just like me and Rajeev. Her color was a shade of pink, as with most new born babies. She had long artistic fingers (ofcourse, there were all the ten, I managed to count them), she might turn to be an artist or a writer some day. Her eyes were large, bright and black. She stared expectantly at me, with quivering lips, yes, she was hungry.
As I held her close to my bosom, I knew that my life would never be the same again. I was a mother and my daughter was the new definition of my life. She was not a guest or an angel from heaven, paying us a visit. She was the living, little, warm human, whose heartbeat would be the rhythm of our life, whose breath would be the fragrance of our days here and whose smile would be our greatest joy.
That was my moment.
**************************************************
There are some moments in life that one would never forget. Memories of those moments, that grow stronger over time. The ones you cherish, treasure and replay time and again in your conscience, when happy or when sad, alike. Counting such moments in life would tell you how many times your life was near-perfect.
My magic moment was when I saw her for the first time ever. She came to our lives 3 weeks before the expected date. Over the 9 months we spent, counting the day of her arrival, I had imagined her with many faces. But nothing had prepared me to the beauty of the perfect little person who was handed over to me by the nurse. Maybe, all mothers feel the same way. Technically, it was the second time I saw her, when I actually saw her. I have a very poor eyesight and my doctor decided to let me go blind before the surgery. So my precious spectacles were handed over to the shivering hands of my mom, along with my other belongings.
Apparently, when after 10 minutes of the surgery, the doctor lifted up a tiny, screaming infant and showed me, I could see nothing, it was infact precisely a bee view, which consists of numerous blurred dots and nothing else. God! I could not even get a chance to count her fingers!
So, as I lay on the ICU bed a few hours after the C-section, with one bottle each hanging on either side of me, one pumping the IV fluid and the other pumping my husband Rajeev's blood into me (he still claims that I turned royal the day he donated his blood for me ;)), all that I could think of was meeting my daughter. I could hear her crying intermittently in the NICU which was side by the ICU. I waited and waited.
It might be a mother's instinct or anything you might call it, but the moment the nurse walked in with a baby, I knew she was mine. She was wrapped in a peach colored cloth and had a pink band around her wrist, with the name 'Baby of Vidya'. A few hours into the world, the link of the umbilical cord lost after 9 months, she was still connected to me through my name, and she would be, I was sure, for the rest of our lives together, one way or the other.
She was hungry and she needed her mother. The nurse helped me hold her. The first thing I noticed about her was her chin. She had a long chin, just like me and Rajeev. Her color was a shade of pink, as with most new born babies. She had long artistic fingers (ofcourse, there were all the ten, I managed to count them), she might turn to be an artist or a writer some day. Her eyes were large, bright and black. She stared expectantly at me, with quivering lips, yes, she was hungry.
As I held her close to my bosom, I knew that my life would never be the same again. I was a mother and my daughter was the new definition of my life. She was not a guest or an angel from heaven, paying us a visit. She was the living, little, warm human, whose heartbeat would be the rhythm of our life, whose breath would be the fragrance of our days here and whose smile would be our greatest joy.
That was my moment.
Sunday, October 30, 2011
The mirror
One day, God gave her a mirror. An unusual mirror it was. On it, she could see how others saw her. She only had to think of that person and alas!, she would find a new her on the mirror...
She thought of her mother..
And in the mirror, she saw the happily smiling toddler that she was... years ago..
For a mother, a child remains a child, forever...
She thought of her child..
And in the mirror, she saw herself dressed as an angel, holding her treasure, close to her bosom..
For a child, her mother is the angel from the other world, who bore her, fed her and loves her with her life...
She thought of her man..
And in the mirror, she saw the smiling, yet deceptive self of her..the calm of the oceans, the beauty of a storm and the mysteries of the life yet to be lived..
For the man, his woman is an unsolved mystery, who excites and baffles him at the same time, whom he would love as if there is no tomorrow and also, once in a while, would hate as if he does not want a tomorrow..
Finally, she thought of herself..
And in the mirror, she saw them all...
For the woman, she is what her world makes her...her love, her dreams and herself...
PS: I know this is a crazy one...but today I stood in front of a mirror and then I wanted something crazy :)
She thought of her mother..
And in the mirror, she saw the happily smiling toddler that she was... years ago..
For a mother, a child remains a child, forever...
She thought of her child..
And in the mirror, she saw herself dressed as an angel, holding her treasure, close to her bosom..
For a child, her mother is the angel from the other world, who bore her, fed her and loves her with her life...
She thought of her man..
And in the mirror, she saw the smiling, yet deceptive self of her..the calm of the oceans, the beauty of a storm and the mysteries of the life yet to be lived..
For the man, his woman is an unsolved mystery, who excites and baffles him at the same time, whom he would love as if there is no tomorrow and also, once in a while, would hate as if he does not want a tomorrow..
Finally, she thought of herself..
And in the mirror, she saw them all...
For the woman, she is what her world makes her...her love, her dreams and herself...
PS: I know this is a crazy one...but today I stood in front of a mirror and then I wanted something crazy :)
Friday, October 14, 2011
The Amorist and I...
I have to thank him, that kind man whom I met yesterday and whom under all probabilities, I would never meet again. I still remember the smile as he passed on the many bottles of deodorants that he had stacked on the shelf behind him since his shop started functioning, possibly wondering if I was a crazy collector of outdated brands of deodorants!
Now please don't ask me why I went there. Fate does not always leave you with too many answers, does it? I was out for a walk on a beautiful evening that was yesterday and suddenly remembered that my most cherished deodorant was wailing in its final moments of utilization every time I squeezed the nozzle. I got into the nearest shop and the above mentioned gentleman displayed his 'historic' possessions infront of me. There were many familiar brands infact, but all those were patronizing the darker sex (if females are the fairer sex, the male counterparts have to be the darker ones!). And then he dug out this black bottle with a cool green lining which held the title 'The Amorist'. I can't really blame him for the most stupid decision that I had taken as a consumer in the last 27 years, can I? Well, it is true that he was chattering so much that I could not get a chance to read what was written. Neither did it help that he considered the items in his shop to be better than those in the 'new found, lifeless shopping malls' as he put it. Oh, he did not allow testing the deos either, which is normal. I don't remember having told him at any point that the deo was for my brother or husband or for that matter, any guy. Anyways, I was lured in to buying this fabulous bottle of 'Set Wet Amorist' deodorant for men!.
Now, where were my brains? What was I thinking? Hadn't I seen those horrendous ads of a cute guy holding a bottle of this despicable specimen of deodorant and 3 females writhing in pleasure over the sheer joy of watching him spray it over his six-pack? Did it say anywhere that the scantily clad females had used it too? And didn't the ad clearly mentionSet Wet Deos for men?. It so happened that, until today morning, my brains were out somewhere, playing poker with its friends.
The moment I applied the new deo today morning, I knew I was stinking. Miraculously, at this point, my brains came back after the game and I thought of taking a look at the bottle I held. Bad news, this is how it read,
"Get Set Wet Style, Get Very, Very Sexy!!( Well, no complaints so far)
New Set Wet Style Amorist is the perfect lady killer(Shittttttttt!!!)
Its enticing, seductive and works brilliantly without you having to try too
hard(Yeah, sure, I was already stinking like I jumped in to a deodorant cauldron)
Spray it on and let yourself loose(I am already finding it difficult to breath
and loosening my non existent tie)
There will be plenty who would die for an encounter with you(That was bad news!!, could not really imagine a bunch of girls flocking around me, looking for the guy!!
Since I didn't have the time to change or better even, take a bath and wash away my sins, I proceeded to the class with the abomination sprayed all over me. Was I imagining it or was it really happening? I can bet that there were atleast half a dozen ladies hovering around me, sniffing hard! Field day for my neighbor Shushant, uh, don't thank me dear friend, its all in the game. Apparently, some guys to whom I never really talked also came to talk to me today. Now, what am I to conclude from that? Should I doubt my reputation or their orientation?
Anyways, after my first and last day of being drenched in a male deodorant, I can't say that I hated it or anything. The odor is a little too strong for my liking, but it is good! On a man, it might even be seductive. So its my husband Rajeev or my brother Vishnu who would be the lucky ones who would be gifted with this particular green bottle. On second thoughts, Rajeev would not get it. A man smelling much too delicious in the deo that his wife gifted him, might seriously affect our plans of a happily ever after. So it is my brother. Oh, do I see him jumping on to a open geep with 5 females, all dying to grab and bite him? Well, that is how the deo ads these days are, aren't they? An artificial substance applied to the body to affect body odor caused by bacterial growth and the smell associated with bacterial breakdown of perspiration in armpits (in short, helps you to not stink like a pig) has now been portrayed as a Weapon of Mass Seduction? Oh my, and I end up buying the wrong brand!!!
Now please don't ask me why I went there. Fate does not always leave you with too many answers, does it? I was out for a walk on a beautiful evening that was yesterday and suddenly remembered that my most cherished deodorant was wailing in its final moments of utilization every time I squeezed the nozzle. I got into the nearest shop and the above mentioned gentleman displayed his 'historic' possessions infront of me. There were many familiar brands infact, but all those were patronizing the darker sex (if females are the fairer sex, the male counterparts have to be the darker ones!). And then he dug out this black bottle with a cool green lining which held the title 'The Amorist'. I can't really blame him for the most stupid decision that I had taken as a consumer in the last 27 years, can I? Well, it is true that he was chattering so much that I could not get a chance to read what was written. Neither did it help that he considered the items in his shop to be better than those in the 'new found, lifeless shopping malls' as he put it. Oh, he did not allow testing the deos either, which is normal. I don't remember having told him at any point that the deo was for my brother or husband or for that matter, any guy. Anyways, I was lured in to buying this fabulous bottle of 'Set Wet Amorist' deodorant for men!.
Now, where were my brains? What was I thinking? Hadn't I seen those horrendous ads of a cute guy holding a bottle of this despicable specimen of deodorant and 3 females writhing in pleasure over the sheer joy of watching him spray it over his six-pack? Did it say anywhere that the scantily clad females had used it too? And didn't the ad clearly mentionSet Wet Deos for men?. It so happened that, until today morning, my brains were out somewhere, playing poker with its friends.
The moment I applied the new deo today morning, I knew I was stinking. Miraculously, at this point, my brains came back after the game and I thought of taking a look at the bottle I held. Bad news, this is how it read,
"Get Set Wet Style, Get Very, Very Sexy!!( Well, no complaints so far)
New Set Wet Style Amorist is the perfect lady killer(Shittttttttt!!!)
Its enticing, seductive and works brilliantly without you having to try too
hard(Yeah, sure, I was already stinking like I jumped in to a deodorant cauldron)
Spray it on and let yourself loose(I am already finding it difficult to breath
and loosening my non existent tie)
There will be plenty who would die for an encounter with you(That was bad news!!, could not really imagine a bunch of girls flocking around me, looking for the guy!!
Since I didn't have the time to change or better even, take a bath and wash away my sins, I proceeded to the class with the abomination sprayed all over me. Was I imagining it or was it really happening? I can bet that there were atleast half a dozen ladies hovering around me, sniffing hard! Field day for my neighbor Shushant, uh, don't thank me dear friend, its all in the game. Apparently, some guys to whom I never really talked also came to talk to me today. Now, what am I to conclude from that? Should I doubt my reputation or their orientation?
Anyways, after my first and last day of being drenched in a male deodorant, I can't say that I hated it or anything. The odor is a little too strong for my liking, but it is good! On a man, it might even be seductive. So its my husband Rajeev or my brother Vishnu who would be the lucky ones who would be gifted with this particular green bottle. On second thoughts, Rajeev would not get it. A man smelling much too delicious in the deo that his wife gifted him, might seriously affect our plans of a happily ever after. So it is my brother. Oh, do I see him jumping on to a open geep with 5 females, all dying to grab and bite him? Well, that is how the deo ads these days are, aren't they? An artificial substance applied to the body to affect body odor caused by bacterial growth and the smell associated with bacterial breakdown of perspiration in armpits (in short, helps you to not stink like a pig) has now been portrayed as a Weapon of Mass Seduction? Oh my, and I end up buying the wrong brand!!!
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Its complicated!
I still haven't been able to understand what it means when some one gives his/her relationship status as 'Its complicated'. Its particularly funny when the profile in question belongs to a 17 year old. And more so because all relationships inevitably are complicated, irrespective of your age, sex or sexual orientation!
From how I understand it, 'Its complicated' can mean the following. I am taking a male as my sample specimen for this study for the obvious reason though all the below points apply equally to females too!
1. You are in a state of indecision as to whether you are actually in love or not. I am being too optimistic here, but in most of the cases, it's your partner who is in this particular dilemma. You cannot spit it out because there is a chance of a 'Yes' somewhere in the distant horizon. You cannot swallow it either because the horizon seems to be a few tiny light years away from the Milky way.
2. Another possibility of the above mentioned complication could be due to the presence of more than one female in the frame and our shy groom is out there in the sun, holding a garland, wondering which one to choose. Please don't assume that our 17 year old is being chased by an axe mob of females, its more like him chasing them. The count of the females can go up to any number and as it goes up, the complexity of 'Its complicated' shoots up too, following a parabolic curve.
3. Yet more disastrous is it when there are more than one guy lingering around a single female. Of these, one has to be a villain and the other has to be a hero, Bollywood style and yes, the hero would always get the girl. Now, you are not able to decide whether you are the hero or the best man at the wedding.
4. More often than not 'Its complicated' is an open invite. I am free and I am available and I can give up what I am into currently because you are important. So why not just single and why Its complicated?. Market value!! Remember, the utility of a commodity follows its demand curve. Or is it the other way round? Well, I don't know, just apply a little commonsense here ;).
5. I must give credit to some for whom it really is complicated. Issues at home, trouble with the relation as such, uninvited interference of a third person and so on.. I do wish that you would soon be able to transform your status to Marrried/Engaged or if it suits you, to being Single.
Relations are tricky. The relation status is just another fancy word, being Single does not make you ready to mingle, being Committed does not make you a Romeo ready to die for his Juilet and being Its complicated does not make it any more complicated or simple than it really is!!
So be ready to sing,
You brought your worst and I’m right here
Now I've seen it all, and it’s never been so clear
Laa laa laaa.....
From how I understand it, 'Its complicated' can mean the following. I am taking a male as my sample specimen for this study for the obvious reason though all the below points apply equally to females too!
1. You are in a state of indecision as to whether you are actually in love or not. I am being too optimistic here, but in most of the cases, it's your partner who is in this particular dilemma. You cannot spit it out because there is a chance of a 'Yes' somewhere in the distant horizon. You cannot swallow it either because the horizon seems to be a few tiny light years away from the Milky way.
2. Another possibility of the above mentioned complication could be due to the presence of more than one female in the frame and our shy groom is out there in the sun, holding a garland, wondering which one to choose. Please don't assume that our 17 year old is being chased by an axe mob of females, its more like him chasing them. The count of the females can go up to any number and as it goes up, the complexity of 'Its complicated' shoots up too, following a parabolic curve.
3. Yet more disastrous is it when there are more than one guy lingering around a single female. Of these, one has to be a villain and the other has to be a hero, Bollywood style and yes, the hero would always get the girl. Now, you are not able to decide whether you are the hero or the best man at the wedding.
4. More often than not 'Its complicated' is an open invite. I am free and I am available and I can give up what I am into currently because you are important. So why not just single and why Its complicated?. Market value!! Remember, the utility of a commodity follows its demand curve. Or is it the other way round? Well, I don't know, just apply a little commonsense here ;).
5. I must give credit to some for whom it really is complicated. Issues at home, trouble with the relation as such, uninvited interference of a third person and so on.. I do wish that you would soon be able to transform your status to Marrried/Engaged or if it suits you, to being Single.
Relations are tricky. The relation status is just another fancy word, being Single does not make you ready to mingle, being Committed does not make you a Romeo ready to die for his Juilet and being Its complicated does not make it any more complicated or simple than it really is!!
So be ready to sing,
You brought your worst and I’m right here
Now I've seen it all, and it’s never been so clear
Laa laa laaa.....
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